*The Story of My Life*
Here it is, the story of my life. I’m putting it all out there for everyone to see, judge, and relate too. It actually is my life condensed into a little box.
Our story begins with a young, shy, naive boy who had a very loving mother. This boy loved playing with action figures, and living in his imagination. He had a few friends, but not many.
After just entering grade 7, being 11 years old, my life hit a big pot hole. This is where our story begins:
I keep complaining how much I hate school, and my mother is really upset with the educational system, so she takes me out of school permanently to HOME SCHOOL me. This is essentially social suicide. I was so embarrassed that my mom took me out of school I avoided all my friends phone calls, and never saw any of them again. It was like I dropped off the face of the planet. They never heard or saw me again just like that. I was SO embarrassed I couldn’t even pickup the phone to tell them why I left…
For the Record, I’m not and never have been a Natural. I am 100% self taught in every aspect of this game. The one thing I AM is a determined little bastard who never gives up until he reaches his goal.
Being home schooled means I’m home all the time. The one thing I really enjoyed doing was making stop motion movies. So I’d sit at home all day long animating plasticine figurines and toys. Youtube didn’t exist at this time, so you may be wondering why I was making them and who was watching them. Well, I was watching them. My mom was watching them. And my little brother was watching them. This was the only audience I needed. I refused to show ANYONE else, because I was too self conscious they would think I was a freak for spending my time animating plasticine characters and not hanging out with friends (I had none).
Two years later, at the age of 13, I discovered something exciting… After being totally alone for over a year I was craving some kind of social activity! I had discovered Chat Rooms. But not ordinary chat rooms, these were RPG chat rooms. And no, not chat rooms where you talk about video games. Chat rooms where you pretend you’re in a fantasy world. For example your user name would be your character, it would look something like this “jack_of_the_darklegion” and you would pretend each chat room was a new place. So the chat rooms were titled “The old wooden Tavern,” or maybe “an open field by a river.” And when you entered a room, you had to type something like this: “:Enters the room with his sword sheathed at his side, he looks around with a grim look plastered upon his face and a craving for ale on his tongue.”
This was fun, in fact I was loving it! But there was one problem… I had NO IDEA how to type! And the most fun in all of this fantasy would be the part where you fight other characters! And to fight you had to type fast because it relied on your typing speed! (e.g. one person types an attack, and if you type a dodge move before they type that their connect sentence you dodged the attack. Aft 7 “connects” your character was dead.) So not being able to type AT ALL people kept killing me! And this is where my determination to learn kicked in.
Reading this it may not seem like much of an accomplishment to you, but I was the slowest typer out of the entire grade in middle school. It took me 1.5 hours to finish 3 sentences, I was THAT bad.
Instead of making video’s I now concentrated solely on improving my typing skills. I spent every single day on “Mavis Beacon teaches typing,” as well as blind folding my self while my mother read me warhammer books out loud so I could type without looking.
In 6 months I became the FASTEST typer in the entire chat. I had started a “clan” of role players called “The Dark Legion” and had over 200 members under me. My typing speed clocked in between 180 – 210 words per minute (205 was the fasted I ever got on a typing test. One which was full of typo’s. So my real speed with accuracy was probably 180 when I went all out) Now I don’t know if you guys know typing speeds, but this is faster than spit. I could essentially type faster than you could talk. Now when I was ic (we called ic being “in character”), I would kill anyone who tried to fight me. I could type my connects before they could even read the attack. I became the absolute best, and everyone knew and feared me. I had more friends that ever in my life. my list of friends went well past 300. (albeit, internet friends though)
This was great and fun… but guess what… Time to go back to high school! And now I’m 14 years old! I spent the last 3 years completely shut off from any REAL social interaction. My parents were on welfare at this time and I wore clothes that were donated to us through charity events. Going to Walmart was considered a treat! And now I’m supposed to go to school and fit in? Hahahah, this is not happening. To make matters worse I went back one grade, I should have been put into grade 10, but since I spent 3 years doing ZERO schooling I thought my safest bet was to go into grade 9.
Of course when you know no body, and you’re incredibly shy and terrified of social embarrassment, the only people who are going to be your friend or Nerds, Geeks, and Dweebs. Welcome to my new social circle! Being the fasted typer online doesn’t matter anymore. I can’t type 2 sentences before they can read and kill them anymore. Now they’re real and in my face. Oh great…
I remember I used to sit alone a lot at lunch at this one table, it was on the “10th graders side” of the lunch room. I should note this school was full of rich and incredibly preppy kids. Regurgitate a mental viewing of the high schools littered with jocks and Cheer leaders in movies and you have a direct reference point. Anyway, here I am sitting on the grade 10 side and they think I’m a grade 9. So one day these 5 “big grade 10 guys” came by and sat down with me. They looked at me and said, I quote, “This is the grade 10 side, get the f*ck back to the grade 9 side faggot.” Now what I forgot to mention is my parents ALWAYS forced me to go to karate Classes. I used to hate it at first! Eventually I stopped going at the age of 12, but at the dojo where I trained, I was the first 11 year old to reach the belt of Brown. We’re talking in the history of the Dojo. I was incredibly good at it. Like I said earlier, not to toot my own horn but I catch onto everything at an extreme speed and if the determination is there, not only do I catch on. But I excel. (I’m a strong believer ANYONE can excel at anything they put their mind too, no matter how difficult it may seem. I am NOT and never will be special, you and I are alike. We are brothers.)
Anyway, back to the bullies. So I tell them “listen, I’m supposed to be in grade 10, so I can sit here all I like.” (taking karate gave me confidence, even if I was totally afraid of social embarrassment) The kids all stood up, looked at me, and said “If you don’t move we’re going to punch you out right now.” What did I do? I stood up, looked at their leader, and said: “Punch me out. I dare you.” What do you think happened? They ran their mouth a bit and then left. My nerd friends ran over afterwards and told me I was going to get my ass kicked and I should just shut up and sit on their side. But I refused.
Now here’s where my story gets exciting! There was this girl in art class, her name was Val. I’ll describe Val for you briefly: 5’5″, brown hair dyed blond, 100% European and HOT as all hell. She’s does modeling now, let’s put it that way. So this girl starts to talk to me a lot during classes, to the point where it’s becoming a major distraction. Eventually she offers her phone number out to me and we begin talking. Pretty soon I’m hanging out with her every night as well. Sounds great right? But guess what! I have absolutely no game. I don’t know what to do with girls! Hell, I’m short (I was 5’3″) and I have pimples all over my face (I had bad acne, and I thought I was hideous. I used to avoid all mirrors.) Here I am wearing clothes bought at a damn good will, and this super hot blond is hanging out with me every night. My nerd friends did NOT like this. In fact they used to tell me daily how much they hated her and how they thought she was fake and this and that. I didn’t realize till years later that they were simply… Jealous.
Interesting side note: I have to throw this in here before I forget, because it’s absolutely hilarious: Before knowing anything about any of this pickup stuff (I’m 14 remember), I was at a school dance with my Nerd friends. And we were just sitting there, watching people dance. I didn’t get it! I couldn’t understand the concept of why we were just sitting there, and why people were even dancing who didn’t even like to dance. So I turned to my friends and I said “Hey guys, let’s have some fun. I’m going to approach strangers.” They said to me “NOOO, don’t do it! You’ll look like an idiot!” So I came up with the dumbest pickup line in male history, “Hey guys, I’m a man whore. But tonight I’m half off.” I then said to my friends, “I’m going to go up to every pretty girl I see and tell her this.” That’s right! I did my first approach when I was 14 years old and didn’t even know it! I went up to every girl I saw, and ran that line. Guess what happened? They stopped and talked to me! In fact some were blown away by me! Of course when I noticed they weren’t running away I instantly thought “Crap! Now what do I say?” One of the girls actually grabbed me and put my hands on her hips and begin dancing with me. Afterwards I ran back to my nerd friends and said “GUYS I FUCKING DID IT AND IT’S AWESOME!” They told me I was an idiot again. Of course now I realize they were just jealous because I was obviously a little loony, and they weren’t.
If you asked where my confidence came from to approach girls when I thought I was ugly as hell, I wouldn’t have much of an answer for you. In fact I’d probably say “Karate.” And yes, I was nervous and shaking while approaching, but I pushed my self through it.
Back to the blond girl: Now this girl used to get really close to me, as close as to be sitting on me sometimes and saying things like “If my parents walk in right now it’s not going to look good.” But I was so terrified and had absolutely no idea about social interactions and girls, there was NO WAY in hell I’d ever go for a kiss. So she begins to talk to me about this boy she really liked. And now she’s calling me on the phone, saying I’m like her therapist (I was a super smart kid, but that didn’t help me) and we’d talk and talk and talk about this guy for hours.
Eventually with the influence of my Nerd friends and my self getting pissed off at her, I told her to never call me again because I couldn’t take it anymore, and then told her to fuck her self. This girl musta’ really been digging me, she literally begged me to keep her as my friend. She begged and begged. she phoned back over 3 times. Each of which I hung up on her.
You might be asking yourself, Why did she like a short skinny pimple faced kid so much? Quite possibly because I was a fucking ASSHOLE to her from day one! Sure I listened to her problems, but I also called her a ” moron” and told her how stupid she was. I also NEVER showed her any interest. So she was always thinking “What’s wrong, why isn’t this guy into me?” Yes, as young as 14 girls think these things. At 14 I secretly stumbled onto many “PUA” techniques, but as soon as I stumbled onto them, I lost them. I wasn’t even to approach another girl again until I was 21.
Let’s get going with this story, even though I can type at talking speed, it takes time to recall all these events and get them right, so I’m getting tired of typing this post!
It’s one week after I told this girl off, and refused to be her friend. I’m walking down the hall to my next Class, I see her walking towards me with two of her girlfriends on either side (the cool kids.) They walk right in front and stop me. Val’s friend says, I quote, “THIS guy?! This is Jack? the guy you used to LIKE?!” Valerie quickly responded saying “NO! That’s not him.” Her friends laughed as they walked away. I was totally speechless… That was the absolute most crushing moment of my life. To first find out she DID like me (I was clueless) and then to find out she was totally embarrassed to have liked me, and to have her friends laugh at me for being such a loser and so ugly. It was absolutely humiliating, it crushed my ego like a bug.
I went home that night, I sat in my moms room thinking about things. Wanting life to go back to the Chat Room RPG. Wanting to have people around who liked me, who wanted to be like me, who I admired. I wasn’t a fantasy world sword bearing General with 200 followers anymore. I was ME. The REAL me. And the real me was Ugly, Short, Skinny, unpopular, pimple faced, and a major dweeb. I even still played Warhammer every Sunday.
I remember this next day vividly as if it just happened ten minutes ago. It was lunch time at school, I walked over to my lunchroom table, sat down with my Nerd friends Alex and Jeremy. And I said the following: “I’m going to work out, get buff, and get tons of girls.” They both looked at me, looked at each other, and laughed. They told me again, that I was crazy and it wasn’t going to happen and I’d pretty much be stupid if I tried it. Notice a pattern here with their advice? Besides it all being god awful!
I went home that night, grabbed these stinky sand bag weights that were under my moms bed, and started lifting. Everyday after that I would grab weights again, and lift for hours. I had absolutely NO idea what I was doing! But I wanted to get buff and to get girls. No girl was ever going to hurt me like that again. In fact girls were going to come to me!
Again, like I said before, everything I do, I do incredibly well and catch on fast. Within 3 months it was very noticeable I’d “hit the gym” so to speak. People were stopping me in the halls to say how huge I was getting, and acquaintances began telling me that their chick friends thought I was “hot.” I stopped talking to Alex and Jeremy altogether. I was done with them. I sat with some new friends instead. With the new muscles came a new attitude. An attitude that I was in charge of my life from now on. I was no longer this skinny little pimple faced kid. I was on my way to being Sexy, and boy did I ever love mirrors! No more hiding from them anymore.
Fast forward through the summer and into the next school year:
Family is off welfare, my father opened a successful business and we’re moving into a House in a new city! Woo hoo, time to start over and do shit right! Now I’m a totally new person. Or so I thought… There was something HUGE that only experience could cure, and that was my Naiveness! This is where things in my life hit an amazing High, but also the most devastating low I could possibly imagine.
And with that this story is over! It’s Too Be continued next time I come around to it.
Hope you guys enjoyed my story so far, I’d like to let you know it’s 100% true and real to me. Nothing is fabricated or exaggerated.
- Jack Coxwell
17 Responses to “*The Story of My Life*”
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Wow, I like how you’ve started a blog.
Loved the story. I was a bit unsure in the one video when you said you had 0 experience. You looked like a cool kid I was thinking you might have had a natural side. Guess not (well…sort of
).
Its cool to see how much this reminds me of my life.
I did the RPG thing too
. Made a clan as well. 500 Members, I felt like a king. Theirs a girl in High School right now sort of like Val 
. I push he away and she comes back stronger. I made her pay me 20$ to hand out with me. My highschool is VERY preppy as well.
I’ve done the welfare clothes thing too
. Mavis Beacons where it’s at! 
Anyway, keep up the blog. Too bad you didn’t start this when you were a newbie
.
Peace Bro
Loved your story mate, I guess I can slightly relate to it, i’ve always been a computer nerd at heart (world of warcraft etc..) even though I don’t entirely look it, and i’ve never been the big social type either. However i’ve never really been bullied and i’ve never had a defining point in my life where i’d say to myself “i’m gonna get buff….etc”. I guess i’m sick and fed up of jacking off every morning over girls i wish i got with or lusted over haha. Anyway enough of my life story I was getting a bit carried away there! Keep the videos and the blogs coming it’s an inspiration to see someone go from strength to strength. Peace
- lloyd
wow i can totally relate to your story, i was a computer nerd too who played everquest like non stop cause i had no friends cept nerds, then one day i said fuck it, im gonna be myself in school, and got more social, and with the getting buff as hell thing, i thought the same thing, cept i told myself im not stopping til i look like leonidas from the movie 300
Keep it coming jack!
I did the weights thing too…got attention and attraction but I had absolutely no game!!
nice story jack
i was really uncertain with myself and used to think the girls needs comes before mine. spent most of the year doing nothing talking to girls but not like they liked me. there was 1 i really liked but i couldnt hold the spark for long, and promised id get her by the end of the year but its not like that happened. got in a fight too with braces…not a very good idea.. so then i decided to take up kickboxing..wasnt reallly dedicated to it tho but still learnt techniques and shit and now im more dedicated to my workouts and starting to get buff =D. the sad part is i wasnt cool and my marks were still shit so really i had nothing going for me. but im gonna change that next year and im not gonna do nothing anymore. its my time & im on it.
The Prince
really inspiring man,
I used to be puny too, though now in grade 12 i’m pretty damn buffed which definitely grabs attention from girls (which my girlfriend doesn’t particularly like). ^^ Reading David Deangelo’s website http://www.sosuave.com has been an enormous help…now i look good and feel more confident than ever before, and in the past year i’ve had 3 sexy girlfriends and made 5 successful number closes. Not bad for a guy who used to be a total RETARD with girls >.<
lol i wasn’t meant to gloat but i HIGHLY RECOMMEND a good weights routine + diet, in addition to reading sosuave articles as much as possible, i found that i read the articles so much that i was beginning to incorporate the teachings into my personality, such as the use of cocky comedy in my interactions with women.
- Alan (working on a cool nickname)
Great read Adam! and very inspiring. I’ve hit the weights as well but i think it doesn’t matter how big i get, i’ll always imagine myself as that skinny pimply kid.
What a life you got behind you. Thanks for sharing that with us so well.
I sure can relate to that. RPG, bullied, nerd friends, everything …
Great story man. It was really inspiring.
Yeah, it’s nice to know that even the biggest nerd can change his life around and do anything he sets his mind to. I give you mad props.
After read all this story, i cant find a reason to not hang out with hot girls… DAHM there are Fucking hOT girl here in quebec !!! and Why i didn’t Open my eyes !! right now ill prove to everybody that i have balls. That’s IT
I cant find a reason to not hang out with hot girls… DAHM there are Fucking hOT girl here in quebec !!! and Why i didn’t Open my eyes !! right now ill prove to everybody that i have balls. That’s IT
We were very alike lol, my family was on welfare for a while as well, from the 4th grade I used to be an insane computer wiz, couldn’t afford a gameboy so i used to download ROM’s and play for days on end. Still trying to work through my social awkwardness thought lol
Wow, its strange to read this, because your story is so similar to mine. I too went through Homeschooling for awhile and it had the same effect on my social life. It disappeared. It just proves that our lives are what we make of them. This was very inspiring to read, and if you can do it, I think we all can. Good shit bro.
Wow great , I’m 15 ,
on my 14th I was still thinking that u had to be nice to girls to get them
I hope I’ll be banging a HB when I’m 16
I don’t want to be like you
and I want to be like you
let me explain : Ur old self never approached girls , today I am approaching girls ( but lately it’s almost stopped , I have other things on my mind . But I have a goal and I’m going to make it ! )
So I don’t want to be like you until ur 21
But I want to be the one u were after ur 21th !
ur latest vids are like : great ! I want that too
Only 1 annoying thing : WHEN THE HELL ARE U GOING TO PUT NEW VIDS ON ?
Ur losing fans :p the readers of this site won’t stop after ur vids
they’ll probably go read other stuff too
so keep the hooked for ur own sake !
and my hungry after it :p
That’s a great history man. I’m from Brazil and I’m very impressed with your journey. Your posts have pumped me up to go out and do all the shits I was to afraid to trie. You’re a thrue artist dude.
Hey Jack! You’re a good guy at heart, and I hope even with the thousands of women you probably get now, you stay a smart and determined dude.
I got get going in a few to study some Physics, WOO HOO!
But I love reading things like this, even though I’m a super slow reader. I’m not even sure how I got to my senior year of college… my reading skills are terrible, they aren’t bad actually, I just like to re-read things like 15 times, before I move on.
Anyways, this thing was interesting to read and easy to relate to! It reads like a story and you have incredible writing abilities.
It’s quite a bold move to post something like this out in the open where everone can see, but it points to the fact that no one is born PERFECT, who we are and what we do, all of it is learned habits and experience from the day we are born.
Now-a-days its hard to believe that every individual has an incredible story like this. Although, is it odd that I can’t vividly remember a lot of details like this from my past. Some other time I’ll have to tell you the kinds of things I remember, and I wonder if they have shaped me who I am today. All these silly memories and the feedback I received from them.
Anyways, one day it would be an honor to actually meet you and hang. Toronto isn’t too far from the Detroit area… you know what that means….. ROAD TRIP!